No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2001-08-06 - 1:48 p.m.

strange dream

strange dream last night. to begin, it was one of those dreams where i was alternately taking the part of a participant, and at other times a discorporate near-omniscient observer. i almost had a narrative voice at times, where i was aware of some obscure bit of knowledge that the characters in the dream were ignorant of.

it started with me suiting up for an expedition. the whole dream had a very sci-fi feel to it, that was at times anime in flavor. i was in a sterile, spartan white room, spraying some kind of chemical on my skin and donning a very tight, spandex kind of costume. i remember messing with the hood of it for some time, trying to get it to sit flat over my hair. there were other people around, including some kind of trip leader.

i had the impression that the trip could be dangerous, but there was very little in the way of warnings or obvious safety precautions, besides the weird suits.

i overheard two of the other people talking about two people who were "lost" on a recent expedition. something about them jumping off the path, no one knew why.

we must have gone through some kind of portal, but the dream glossed over that, because suddenly we were on a path. it was made of earth, but it was hanging out in the heavens. we were in deep space somewhere, but there was this mountainous construct out there, and we were perfectly safe on it. air to breathe, gravity, all of that.

here's a bizarre turn. there was a gigantic old man, with flowing white hair and long beard. he was out in space coming towards us. he was riding an old-time bicycle, with the huge front wheel, and the tiny back wheel. he was flanked by two horsemen, who were indistinct figures. i couldn't make out any details on them. out tour-guide said of the old man "i know what he's thinking, but more, i know why he's thinking what he's thinking."

then we were on a different part of the path, kind of a circular area, overlooking a pair of stars. you could stand on the path and see this huge star between your toes. i was now in observer mode, no longer one of the travellers. one of the people, a woman, somehow made the stars wink out. they just fizzled out, stopped shining, and then in a few moments vanished. in my observer mode, i could see the effects of this back on earth, thousands of light years away, yet somehow at the same moment, those stars winked out in the sky over earth. this woman had some kind of mysterious power that no one could understand. when the tour guide ran over to look at the defunct stars, she had this false innocence on her face, as if she was as baffled as the rest.

i just remembered that just before all this in the dream, i (as one of the travellers) had deliberately jumped off the path into the star. but my dream, in the way that they sometimes do, decided to reverse that. it hit the rewind button and went off down another route where that never happened.

so now, after the star outage, someone else jumped off the path (suicidal bunch). now we were on the upper slopes of a mountain. this is where we take another weird turn. things got very anime/superhero here. the whole deep space setting was gone, but the mountain was still hovering of its own accord. now it was suspended over a huge pool of lava. our tour guide got all macho and started making these massive leaps down the side of the mountain and from looping path to looping path. he headed off our suicidal guy, and caught him. they clung to the lower lip of our floating mountain. some woman with us (not the star-winking one) and her pet (which i can only describe as being somewhat pikachu-like) swung down a rope (which had conveniently appeared) and rescued them.

i have a vague recollection that there was more to the dream, but i don't really remember it. besides, this much of it should be more than enough to convince you that i'm a total freak. i can't even begin to understand my subconscious. (although that's a pretty self-evident statement).

beware of sleep. there are strange things lurking.

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