No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2002-02-21 - 10:21 a.m.

A visit to a sadistic doctor, and other crap from my life.

Where did I leave off?

Monday I went to see an orthopedic doctor about my injured shoulder. All the way back in November I messed it up playing soccer, and I just finally see someone about it. Go me. Dr. Sadist was amazingly desensitized to my pain. The visit went something like this.

Dr. Sadist: I'm going to move your arm like this. You tell me when it hurts.

Me: Okay it hurts. Ow, it hurts. It hurts! (Screaming)

Dr. Sadist: Okay, that's normal. Now I'm going to pull your arm like this. You should feel a little bit of pain before the agony kicks in.

Me: (whimpering)

So anyway the upshot is that I have a big green rubber band and some exercises to do, which is less than 20% likely to do any good at all. After two months of that, I'll have to decide if I want to go through life without ever being able to throw anything really hard, or whether I want surgery. I'm going to delay that surgery at least until I see how Dad makes it through it (he's got the same problem and is going under the knife in a month or two).

Monday night was rehearsal at CowPlace. Once again, I felt very much like I wasn't contributing all that much. I think my big contribution for the night was to suggest the word "took". But it was fun nonetheless. DirectorGuy was very busy and kept leaving us to our own devices, which for the most part was shooting the breeze and then pretending that we'd been working. After the rehearsal we went to Rock Bottom for beer and pool.

Let me tell you, hanging out with actor types can be a real treat. They've all got enough personality for two people, and I'm finally starting to feel relaxed around this group. It was a really cool experience. I need more nights like that.

As for the passage of days and nights since then, yep, they keep passing. I've been glued to my computer, looking for jobs, and trying to find a new hosting provider for BigSis' site. I've also decided to try to brush up my programming skills a bit and maybe go for a certification in the hopes that it'll improve my chances of getting a job.

Cause, you know, that whole money thing. Sheesh, I hate money.

Talked on the phone with RockGirl for the first time since our chat. Some trepidation on my part about calling. I figured she'd still be pissed. She was over at OriginalWhiteGuy and Starling's place. Pressure from Starling for me to come down. I didn't. Boring conversation, kind of awkward. I'm not seeing her until Sunday night. I dunno.

Tonight I start the biggest batch of performances in the run of Lear. One a day for the next four days.

My brain is freezing up. This is a boring entry, and I have no idea what else to say.

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