No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2001-09-10 - 4:00 p.m.

wherein another meeting with a mythical woman, and a freaky movie, and listening to echoes leads j$ to yet another sleepless night

this was my weekend for meeting mythical people. for months now Rudy and HeroMan have been telling me with awe-husked voices about the ship-launching beauty, the Mother Theresa temperament and all-around divinity of DutchGoddess. so last night i went with them to another dinner party hosted by DutchGoddess. as you may guess, my expectations had been built up pretty high about this woman.

they were all exceeded.

she's so perfect that i want to hate her for it. but i can't.

she elevates cute-ness to an art-form. really, she's about the cutest thing ever.

and she's nice. i mean, just nice. very friendly and smart and funny and just the slightest hint of vulgar, and back to nice, and then funny, and then more funny, and then yet more nice, and oh yeah, did i mention cute?

of course, Rudy has known her for three years, and the look on his face when he looks at her is a look i've seen in my own mirror. he's so gone over this woman.

as would be any sane man.

HeroMan and i offered to hunt down and maim the guy who's currently jerking her around, so that Rudy can move in. he appeared to give the matter some serious thought.

after the early break-up of the party, we went back to my place and watched "The Cell". ummmm...really, really freaky movie. i can't even tell you. it was a good story, and the visual elements were amazing. but it did not make it easy to get to sleep, let me tell you. plus there was the whole thing where my dvd player decided to give up the ghost about ten minutes before the end of the movie, and we had to drive over to Rudy's to finish it. can you say aaaargh?

anyway, after all that, i was riding back home with Rudy, and i asked him for EchoGirl's phone number. and verified that EchoGirl is not currently seeing anyone. and heard that she delayed the start of the vacation she's currently on so that she could come to my dinner party. and generally got encouragement and support from Rudy about asking her out.

and went home, and lay in my bed, and tried to dream up excuses to get out of it. and dreamed up fantasies about running off to Bohemia. and between random visions of EchoGirl and DutchGoddess, and wondering how my pen pal knows how to say *exactly* the right thing every time, and then remembering The Cell, and then back to EchoGirl, well...

let's just say that i did not sleep well.

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