No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2003-06-14 - 1:00 a.m.

Fleeting crush

For the past two weeks, I've lived inside a mirage, where it looks like my life is all about acting, and everything else is secondary. I've got two more weeks to go before reality reasserts itself. I wish the mirage could go on forever.

Today, we sat in a room with a man has been a professional actor since the 1930s, who saw John Gielgud play Hamlet in 1948, who was a classmate of Gregory Peck. At times, he would lose his train of thought completely, and then apologize by saying "I'm just old." At times, he would say the most profound things I've heard in a long damn time. The life experience, and acting knowledge in this man are precious beyond words, and I'm so glad I was able to learn from him.

Tonight, I went out with folks from the intensive. There's a woman who I'm crushing on. Hard. She's incredibly gorgeous, and such a strong person that I'm very intimidated by her. Even so, I think I might have the gumption to ask her out. Except that she's from Pittsburgh. And I just don't know if I could take a two-week relationship. Especially now. But, damn. I just had to say. Damn.

I'm wicked tired and the beer I had when I got home went right to my head, so you should probably not pay attention to anything I say.

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