No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2002-03-29 - 2:58 p.m.

Good Friday ... for sleeping

So here I sit again at the office, wasting time, and hating what I do (for now) for a living. I'm butt-tired again today. Up till almost three, memorizing the lines on my ceiling and thinking of new forms of self-torture.

Today has been a series of failures of willpower. I will not have another frosty, caffeinated, high-sugar beverage. I will not have another cola. I *will* *not*. Oh, what the Hell ... (glug, glug, glug).

Repeat as necessary.

Here's a little bright spot in today. jo3 asked me to give a toast at his wedding reception. I'm honored beyond words that he would ask me to do that. I'm ignoring the fact that I'd already decided that welcome or no, I was going to give a toast anyway. (Just means I'm well-prepared).

The local paper printed a review of the show at Cow Place today. It doesn't matter much to me because I wasn't a performer being reviewed. And reviews never really mean much. You shouldn't take them seriously at all. That said, massive anal-cranial ratio going on there.

I'm so freaking tired. There's an automated system here at work that sends out emails every time a new bug report appears. I've gotten over 300 today. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside about the quality of this product and this company.

What other random crap can I regale you with? Here's something. I got paperwork in the mail yesterday for unemployment. As of next week, if I were to fill out yet *more* paperwork and jump through some more hoops I could collect unemployment. Of course, now that I'm working 40 hours a week again. I...um...can't collect unemployment. Let's hear it for that efficient government of ours folks. They delayed until two weeks past the time it would have been remotely useful. Though really, I'm kind of glad. It's a stupid pride thing for me, but I never really felt good about the idea of collecting unemployment. And now, while I *have* once in my life applied, I've still never collected.

Maybe when I decide to really become a starving actor I'll do it.

Geez I dunno what else to say. Busy weekend coming up, so there's little chance that I'll update. The highlight is likely to be going to the soccer games tomorrow night. I have a ticket to an autograph session with Mia Hamm. I guess I'm a new a different kind of geek, but she's probably my all-time favorite athlete. I *cannot* wait. I will take gibbering idiot to a new level, I'm sure.

Alright, that's it. Back to work.

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