No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2002-05-15 - 2:25 p.m.

Trailer park dwarves, parking tickets, the three musketeers; all this, yet still lame.

Today I'm a weird mix of tired, hungover, happy, grumbly and sniffly. Sounds like the names of the dwarves if Snow White was set in a trailer park.

Anyway, last night I got a parking ticket. Pisses me off. I knew I was cutting it close on the meter, but damn. I swear the dude must have been sitting by my car waiting for the meter to run down. I got there about three minutes after it should have expired, and there

was already a ticket. Grrrr.

Last night I hung out with a couple of buddies from high school. One of them is moving to

England next week, so we had to get the three musketeers back together just one more time.

I dunno if I was very entertaining, because I showed up late, I was tired as hell, and they'd already been drinking for an hour or two. We sat around and chatted for a bit, but it

was one of those drunken diving into pop philosophy conversations and I couldn't get into it. See all three of us have gone through some very depressed times in our lives, and we used to kind of validate that kind of behavior in each other. Kind of a "My life sucks, too" support group. But I'm actually pretty happy these days. So I wasn't really into it. They both have wives and kids and feel kind of trapped by circumstance. Me determination to

quit doing "real" jobs and become an actor is the kind of thing they'd like to do but can't because of their responsibilities.

Anyway, we ended up sitting around listening to comedy records. I got home waaaaay too late for a school night. I checked email and ate some doritoes and laid in bed going over lines.

Speaking of lines. I am supposed to perform this weekend in the show for which I've been an understudy for months. I got an email today from the guy who I was replacing. He now wants to do the Friday and Sunday shows. Leaving just Saturday for me. Which I guess is okay since I have the whole extended run to perform. But it's still kinda frustrating. I've

been psyching myself up for this for a couple of weeks now and I'm only gonna get one shot

at it. I was hoping that if I sucked the first night, I'd have a chance to get into the groove on the subsequent performances. Now I have one chance, sink or swim.

I told you I was grumbly. It's really okay. It lessens the stress on me, and my chance to go up is really a favor from the dude anyway. It's okay. Honest.

Yeah, so I guess that's it for now. Man, I could use a nap.

Hosted by my beloved DLand
Sign My Guestbook!�� powered by SignMyGuestbook.com