No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2001-11-05 - 1:27 p.m.

sick and tired

i'm sick. and i'm tired. *and* i'm sick and tired.

i haven't updated in too long.

i don't really have time for it today.

last night i told Rudy that i wouldn't be surprised if i got fired this week, and i wouldn't much blame them, either.

i don't understand what i do, i'm not getting it done on time, and i can't seem to force myself to give a shit.

all of that isn't strictly true, but it reflects the way i feel pretty accurately.

today TalksTooMuchGuy (who, by the way, i hate) asked how i was doing.

just to be a bastard, and because at that moment it was more true than it should ever be, i said

"i wish i were dead"

that shut him up.

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