No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at anytime.
There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction,
a blessed unrest keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
-- Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
Was || Will Be || Past Moments || Now || Notes

2001-08-22 - 11:43 a.m.

hepped up on goofballs

well, after tossing and turning all night long, i've now officially pushed through the other side of exhaustion into a strange, giddy exuberance. i suspect i'm running on fumes and will crash hard this weekend (if not before). but in the meantime...


slap me with a duck and call me susan. i'm all hepped up on goofballs today. (all them young kids are hepped up on goofballs these days. what's our country coming to?)

another Portable Banquet last night with just Rudy and i. the whole thing was supposed to be off last night in favor of a movie at Red Rocks tonight (which i of course cannot attend -- gaming night). but HeroMan and Rudy seemed to want to do dinner anyway. then HeroMan bailed on us while we were deciding where to eat. he's been working really hard recently, and his patience is shortened. no big deal, but i just feel bad for him. he needs to mellow a bit. he was a lot more fun when he was unemployed.

anyway Rudy and i went out, talked turkey, talked jobs (i'm not going to talk about temptations today -- the commodores were better (snort)), talked smack, and were generally the talk of the town.

then we went back to my place and played Playstation for about an hour. so at 10pm last night i finally sat down to work on BigSis's site. pushed it kinda late, but got to "feature complete" on the main admin stuff. it's milestone, but there's sooooo much more to do, and just over a week to do it.

at some point in my convo with Rudy last night we were talking about EchoGirl, and he gets this grin on my face. i told him to wipe it off before i smacked it off. okay, i didn't. i just asked him what the hell he was smiling at. he said he'd heard through the grapevine (read HeroMan or eRoommate) that i liked EchoGirl. i fessed up (duh). i kinda hoped that Rudy would have some insight into her current situation and more importantly her official position on EchoGirl-j$ relations. all he had to say was "she asks about you a lot." perhaps promising, but i'm trying hard not to read anything into it.

the smaller your hopes are, the less it hurts when they're crushed.

hurm, there we go again, into bitterness and cynicism.

time for more goofballs.

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